More Jokes

Talking Working Dog

A salesman dropped in to see a business customer. Not a soul was in
the office except a big dog emptying wastebaskets. The salesman
stared at the animal, wondering if his imagination could be playing
tricks on him.

The dog looked up and said, "Don't be surprised. This is just part
of my job."

"Incredible!" exclaimed the man. "I can't believe it! Does your boss
know what a prize he has in you? An animal that can talk!"

"Please don't!" said the dog. "If he finds out I can talk, he'll make
me answer the phone, too!"
***************************************************************************************

A Flying Turtle?

Deep within a forest a little turtle began to climb a tree. After
hours of effort he reached the lowest branch, jumped into the air
waving his front legs, and dropped to the ground. He slowly climbed the
tree again, jumped, and fell to the ground.

The turtle tried again and again while a couple of birds sitting on
a branch watched his efforts. Finally, the female bird turned
to her mate.

"Dear," she chirped, "I think it's time to tell him he's adopted."
****************************************************************************************

Secretary In Training

The boss was very exasperated with his new secretary. She ignored the
telephone when it rang.

"You must answer the telephone," he told her irritably.

"All right," she replied, "but it seems so silly. Nine times out of
ten, it's for you!"
****************************************************************************************

It Pays To Laugh

The boss joined a group of his workers at the coffee urn and told a
series of jokes he'd heard recently. Everybody laughed loudly.
Everybody, that is, except Mike.

When he noticed that he was getting no reaction from Mike, the boss
said, "What's the matter, Mike? No sense of humor?"

"My sense of humor is fine," he said. "But I don't have to laugh. I'm
quitting tomorrow."
****************************************************************************************

A Responsible Employee

A man was interviewing for a job. The interviewer said, "In this job we
need someone who is responsible."

"I'm the one you want," the man replied. "At my last job every time
anything went wrong, they said I was responsible."
****************************************************************************************

George Bush in a primary school...

George Bush goes to a primary school to talk about the war. After his talk, he offers question time.

One little boy puts up his hand and George asked, What is your name?

Bob

And what is your question, Bob?

I have 2 questions.

First, why did the USA invade Iraq without the support of the UN?

Second, why are you president when al gore got more votes?

Just then, the bell rings for recess.

George bush informs the kiddies that they will continue after recess.

When they resume George says, Ok where were we?

Oh, thats right. Question time. Who has a question?

A different little boy raises his hand.

George points him out and asked him what is your name?

Steve

And what is your question Steve?

I have 4 questions.

First, why did the USA invade Iraq without the support of UN?

Second, why are you president when Al Gore got more votes?

Third, why did the recess bell go 20 minutes early?

Fourth, where is Bob
****************************************************************************************

No comments:

Post a Comment